Rowlandson the Caricaturist; a Selection from His Works. Vol. 2 by Joseph Grego

Hudibrastic Poem in eight Cantos by Quiz. Illustrated with twenty-eight engravings by Rowlandson._ Plates dated October 1, 1815. (Quiz fecit, Rowlandson sc.) London: Printed by T. Tegg. The intention of this work seems an attempt to hold up the Governor-General (the Marquis of Hastings) to opprobrium, but whether deserved or not, Europeans have small chance of judging. Frontispiece.--A new Map of India from the latest authority. The Governor-General (Marquis of Hastings) and his Council (Imbecility) mounted on an Elephant. Tusks (marked Monopoly and Ambition) fettered by Restrictions (Board of Control and House of Commons) &c. Titlepage.--The End of the Pagoda Tree, and the ultimate fate of the Viceroy and his Council, &c. &c. A Scene in the Channel. The Modern Idol Juggernaut. Miseries of the First of the Month. The Burning System Illustrated. Missionary Influence, or how to make Converts. An Extraordinary Eclipse. Labour in vain, or his Reverence Confounded. Hindoo Prejudices. John Bull Converting the Indians. More Incantations, or a Journey to the Interior. (Nepaul War). Miseries in India. (Insects.) The Bear and Ragged Staff. (Viceroy and Council as Idols.) Hindoo Incantations. A View in Elephanta. [Illustration: HINDOO INCANTATIONS--A VIEW IN ELEPHANTA.] The Guide declar'd that often here, Things supernatural appear; To prove it he produc'd a book, From which Qui Hi a drawing took, Of which the modern true translation, Is simply 'Hindoo Incantation.' It states that _some one_, years ago, Had tried futurity to know, And he employed an old Hindoo, To get him but a single view Of future things--and lo! an hour Was fixed to show the Brahmin's pow'r, The place appointed was the spot Where Qui Hi and his friends had got, Under Great _Brahma's triple head_, That then struck unbelievers dead. The Brahmin, when the Ghurry's sound Told _one_, was with the idol found, Soliciting he would assert His power, and infidels convert. The stranger now approach'd the place, With terror pictur'd in his face. 'Infidel!' said the Brahmin, 'now I shall observe my sacred vow. Come hither, and you'll shortly see And tremble at _futurity_!' Seating the man, he now applies A magic glass before his eyes; When, lo! the Elephanta shook, And Brahma thus in thunder spoke-- 'Mark, reptile! the decrees of Fate, Which, _Brahma says_, he will complete: Till then your destiny await!' He said, and, with a stroke of thunder, The sacred temple bursts asunder; Seizes the caitiff by the hair, And hurls him headlong thro' the air. He tumbled down to whence he came, _Somewhere_ about the Hooghly stream. Phantasmagoria. A View in Elephanta. The Modern Phaeton, or the Hooghly in danger. Qui Hi arrives at the Bunder Head. Qui Hi in the Bombay Tavern. Pays a Nocturnal Visit to Dungaree. Attends General Koir Wig's Levee. Qui Hi's Introduction and cool Reception. Qui Hi shows off at the Bobbery Hunt. Qui Hi at Bobbery Hall. All alive in the Chokee. Last Visit from the Doctor's Assistant. Qui Hi's last March to Padree Burrows's Go Down. Strange Figures _near_ the Cave of Elephanta, 1814. _Auspicio Regis, et Senatus Angliæ._ _June 1, 1815._ _Naples and the Campagna Felice, in a series of letters (by Lewis Engelbach). With Illustrations by Rowlandson, &c._ 8vo. Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand. (Reprinted from Repository of Arts, 1810-13.) Frontispiece.--The Colonel (Don Luigi) awakened from a sleeping _tête-à-tête_ by a serenade from his fair, and lately unconscious, companion. Se tanto a me piace Si rara beltà; Io perdero la pace, Quando si sveglerà. If, while entranced in balmy rest, His charms can give such pain; When he awakes, my wounded breast Will ne'er know peace again. Don Luigi's baggage seized by four Lazzaroni. Ancient Greek Paintings from Herculaneum: Ariadne, Bacchante and Satyr, &c. Don Luigi meets Donna Anna in the Museum. Ancient Greek Paintings from Herculaneum: Centaurs, Chiron teaching Achilles to play the lyre, &c. Sleeping _tête-à-tête_ at a first visit of Don Luigi. Don Michele getting up the ship's side. Don Luigi's Ball. A Bacchanalian Scene at Don Luigi's Ball. Don Michele preparing for his Triumphal Expedition. The Letter Writer, Naples. _The Letter Writer._--'On our way to the mole we had some difficulty in passing through a crowd of people, who, with great eagerness, and with Neapolitan clamour, had assembled round a man, sitting with pen and ink before a frail table, busily employed in committing to paper the crude thoughts of a country clown in the attitude of dictating to him; for the noise was too loud to hear what was going forward. A board above the head of the engrosser proclaimed his calling: '_Qui si fanno memoriali, lettere, ed altre scritture, nel ottimo stilo moderno._' (Here are drawn up memorials, letters, and other writings, in the best modern style.) Ever eager to seize any opportunity of observing the manners and national character of a people whom I have every reason to think better of than some of our superficial magpie-tourists, I pressed forward to obtain a nearer view of the transactions of this universal secretary, when my companion, Don Michele, pulling me back by the skirt of my coat, begged I would not demean myself by thus mixing with the vulgar. * * * * * 'The composer of letters was just receiving from an elderly woman the sum of six _grani_ (about threepence) for an epistle he had indited to her son at _Bari_; after which a farmer, next in rotation, was admitted into presence. His business appeared to be on secret service, for the corresponding oracle politely requested some of the more curious auditors to step a little aside. At first, indeed, the farmer's instructions were conveyed in a whisper; but as a Neapolitan loves dearly to talk as loud as his lungs will let him, and to accompany his sermocinations with the most expressive gestures, it soon became less difficult to discover that the subject under present consideration was a horse which had been sold to a cavalry officer, and for which a balance was still owing; the prompt payment whereof was to be peremptorily insisted on by a respectful dun. As soon as a period was happily brought to paper, it was read over to the listening clodhopper, who, in a manner, beat time to the emphatic and rhythmical reading of the professor by periodical nods of the head, and at the end of the sentence expressed his astonishment at the sagacity with which his obscure ideas had been caught up and classified. This literary production, owing probably to the importance of the subject, was disposed of for the valuable consideration of eight _grani_ (fourpence), paper included; and its possessor, with inward satisfaction, left the oracular tripod, in order to make room for a Turkish captain of a _polacca_, whose literary necessities consisted in a memorial claiming the restitution of some goods illegally seized.... When the document was ready for signature, _Ibrahim Reis_, who could neither read nor write, was desired to make his _cross_ at foot, which he refused with religious abhorrence; but, dipping his little finger into the inkstand, imprinted on the paper a correct facsimile of the tortuous furrows of his cuticle by way of signet. To my great surprise, this state paper was valued at no more than one carlin (fivepence), although engrossed on a folio page and decorated with some fancifully flourished initials. [Illustration: THE LETTER-WRITER.] 'The Turk no sooner discharged his literary debt than a well-dressed young lass gained his place. (This interview is pictured forth in the artist's illustration.) The despatch, however, which was to be written for her, must have been on secret and confidential service, for the instructions she gave to the engrosser were communicated in so low a whisper that, from my observatory, the scene appeared one of purely pantomimical action. When I relate that the time employed by this universal author in the production of the farmer's dun and the Turk's memorial did not exceed half an hour, and that the contents, although somewhat fustian, were very much to the purpose, you will agree with me that Signor Bucatelli possessed talents far above his station. Indeed, Don Matteo assured me that he was as good a poet as an epistolary writer, and that his sonnets on any particular occasion, such as for a wedding, a birthday, &c., may be obtained on the shortest notice, and at equally reasonable rates; in short, that he could wield his pen on any subject whatsoever. 'To a publisher in England a man like Signor Bucatelli would be an invaluable treasure, a host within himself, by the versatility of his genius and the despatch of his literary labours: his charges of _authorship_, as you have seen, are consonant with the modesty of true genius. His elevated style of writing (truly _nel ottimo stilo moderno_) would soon render him a most popular author with us. I was just going to step down to give him the substance of a poetical epistle as a specimen of his abilities, when a little girl brought him a small dish of stewed Windsor beans, a large raw cucumber, and a crust of bread. This frugal fare, and a glass of iced water from the neighbouring stall, well calculated to preserve his intellectual powers unclogged, Don Matteo informed me, was the whole of his dinner; which, together with a cigar by way of dessert, interrupted his official duties for about half an hour, after which, if matters of pressing service remained to be despatched, he would resume his quill, and suspend his _siesta_, or afternoon nap, to a late hour of the day.' _Don Luigi's Ball._--Before leaving his apartments on the _Infrescata_ the writer was anxious, as a slight return for the kindness of his host and the hospitalities he had received in Naples, to give a dance to a few friends of his own and of his entertainer, his host and friend Don Michele undertaking the entire responsibilities of inviting the guests, ordering refreshments, decorating the chambers, and other preliminaries. '"First, as to the company," reports the Don, "there will be ten couples, besides our family and odd ones, if they all come, of which there is little doubt; and what is more, _gente di garbo_ (people of quality), such as you might suppose my friends to be. Three or four will come in their own carriages; and some of the lasses will show you what is called dancing at Naples. Care, too, has been taken that they should not want for good music; you will have, Signor Don Luigi, the first oboe of St. Carlo, two excellent violins, a flute, tenor, and violoncel; my son will play the tambarine." '"Six musicians, Don Michele, for this little dance! Why, that's out of all reason. Half the number----" '"Are _hired_; and the others, gentlemen high in the profession, who for _my_ sake have promised to assist as friends at your party. Money, of course, is out of the question. You see, good sir, Don Michele can command a thing or two. As many more would have come if I had asked them, but these will be sufficient to begin the evening with a little concert; my friend will give you a concerto on the oboe; one of the ladies will sing a _scena_ from an opera, to which we may add a duet or two; and at ten o'clock the dance shall begin. As to the refreshments, I have almost run my legs off to get you the rum (the ladies were to be treated with ice punch, as a rarity). Seventy ices are ordered, cakes and sweetmeats as you desired, and a friend of mine will lend us a dozen of wall chandeliers." These lights, connected with festoons of artificial flowers, and a number of pots of flowers exhaling their fragrance over the rooms, gave the place an elegant appearance. [Illustration: DON LUIGI'S BALL.] 'The musicians arrived in good time, and the company dropped in fast after eight o'clock. To receive such a number of strange faces appropriately was a most irksome task,' continues the writer; 'but it was alleviated by the sight of many a good-looking young lass, and two or three real beauties, and one especially, Donna Carlina. My English friends from the city, and the lieutenant and doctor from the frigate, likewise made their appearance in due time; and healthily as their countenances shone forth, and well-dressed as they were, they greatly eclipsed my Neapolitan bucks, and found much grace among the ladies. I could not help remarking the contrast of manners between two Christian countries. In a more northern latitude, persons coming to the party of a perfect stranger would have conducted themselves with that cautious, anti-social reserve which some people call good manners; some of the ladies would have sat down on their chairs as prim and as stiff as so many hop-poles, cast down their modest looks until spoken to by charity, and then rebuffed a second attempt by a monosyllabic reply, a "Yes, sir," an "Indeed, sir?" a "You are very good, sir," &c. Now I will just tell you how matters went on in the _Infrescata_. Monstrous bows and introductory compliments: this over, all these people seemed as though they had been twenty times in my company.' The Don describes the improvised introductory concert, at which nearly all the company assisted, the Neapolitans having a natural taste for melody, and most of them being fair musicians; the entertainer next gave orders to prepare for the dance, and to hand refreshments in the interval. 'My punch,' he continues, 'found much favour with all present, the ladies not excepted, who emptied their glasses as rapidly as if it had been lemonade. Although not dancing, I was fully employed in another way. With all our windows open, the strains of my numerous orchestra propagated their sound over the whole neighbourhood, some of whose inhabitants, impelled by the attraction of sweet sounds, could not resist favouring me with their company. The circumstance of their not being invited to the feast appeared to them a mere trifle not worthy of their attention; and an extraordinary celerity in decorating their exterior (which is all the essential part of a Neapolitan's full dress), would soon enable them to appear in company with Neapolitan decency. To my great surprise, therefore, Don Michele and I had to receive, from time to time, an influx of these unbidden guests, who in most submissive language begged a thousand pardons for their freedom and intrusion. As Don Michele, my master of the ceremonies, seemed to know them all, and, moreover, as I could neither help their coming, nor, when once arrived, turn them out, I thought it best to put a good face on the matter, and receive every one, especially the ladies, with a hearty welcome (as pictured forth in the plate), assigning them places in the adjoining room, where I contrived to form another set of dances; for the number of these parasitical guests soon grew nearly equal to that of my standard company. As my company were now capering away in two of my apartments, I blush to confess that my resolution to keep my toes in a state of quiet quiescence was shaken at last. I could have withstood the pressing solicitations of half-a-dozen of these exhilarated damsels, but for the irresistible temptation of their animated example, and of the excellent music. Fancy the loving smiles, the glistening eyes, the seducing attitudes of these pretty Neapolitan bacchantes, and then ask your conscience how long any Christian, were he even a Quaker or Moravian, could have stood proof against such attraction? The worst of the thing was, that having once broken my vow by dancing with Miss Carlina, a kind of rivalry ensued among the other ladies, most of whom now laid a successive claim to be led down a country dance by _il Signor Colonello_. 'In the course of these pedestrian evolutions I thought I observed in several of my fair partners, cheerful as they had been before, an unusual and extraordinary access of spirits and gaiety; which, with every allowance for the southern latitude and the ice punch (now administered to them the more frugally by reason of the unlooked-for increase in my numbers), I was at a loss to account for, till I saw my man Benedetto whisper something into Don Michele's ear, which the latter telegraphed into mine. 'But before I let you into this secret it is proper that, like a skilful general, I should in my report give a correct description of the localities of the field of battle. The kitchen belonging to my apartments is on the same floor with them, and in this particular the Neapolitan system of domestic architecture is not different from what you may have observed in a set of chambers, or in many old-fashioned mansions in England. Right opposite to the entrance of this kitchen of mine there is an elevated shelf, on which stand (I had better say _stood_) my three wine-bottles, of immense calibre; the first (having been emptied since my stay in the _Infrescata_) then, and now, containing from six to eight gallons of excellent atmospheric air (such as you breathe at this altitude); the second, of similar dimensions, about half full of delicious old _Pozzuoli_ wine; and the third, not less in size, brim-full of the like grape-juice, with its fluid oil-bung floating at the top. 'No sooner did one of the damsels espy the forbidden shelf than the assault thereon was a settled matter: _veni, vidi, bibi_, was the word; and my delicious _Pozzuoli_ wine fell an easy prey to their sacrilegious hands and palate. _Implentur veteris Bacchi_, or, in plain English, mesdames tippled till they had their fill, and what they left was very nearly finished by four or five half-starved footmen and other hall rabble in attendance on their worthy masters; for when Don Michele went into the kitchen he found but a small remnant in one of the bottles, which he secured in his own room. 'Inspired with the juice and further excited by the agitation of dancing, most of my fair guests became still more exhilarated; some grew ecstatically merry, and a few scarcely manageable. Surrounded by these voluptuous "bacchæ," I feared the fate of Orpheus. Their frolics, however, I must say to their credit, were chiefly levelled at Don Michele, probably because he had spoiled the continuation of their sport. The poor man had now to suffer all sorts of mischief for refusing to join in their revels, till at last, for the sake of peace, he consented to dance _one_ minuet, and no more. All was hushed in an instant, when he placed himself with his fortunate partner in the middle of the room, as stiff as buckram and as serious as if he were occupied with the solution of an algebraic problem. But no sooner had he performed the first step or two, than, in turning his body with grave elegance on the pivot of his toe, a pair of white silk garters were seen gracefully dangling down his back, and describing, at every turn of his automaton body, a variety of flowing irregular curves in the circumambient air. The merriment which this unusual sight occasioned, was in vain attempted to be stifled in a muttered titter; it soon burst out with increased violence, his wife not excepted, who heartily joined the general laugh, but informed her better half of the cause of the satisfaction he gave the company. When I learned the extent of the spoliation committed upon my bin, I did not so much regret the actual loss I thereby sustained, as apprehend some unpleasant scenes of interruption to our festivity and mirth from the excessive indulgence in the forbidden juice. However, whether it was owing to the excellence of the vintage, or to strength of constitution in the fair partakers, only one casualty occurred. 'The dawn of morn was the signal for the gradual separation of the company, from all of whom, whether of the establishment or extra guests, I had received in the course of the evening the most pressing requests to make their house my own; and to their credit I must say that, as far as I have yet had time or inclination to try the sincerity of their invitations, I have had no cause to regret my complaisance. 'When I relate that five leaden ice-moulds and eight of the confectioner's pewter spoons were missing, you will scarcely suppose that any of the good things, such as cakes, sweetmeats, &c., were suffered to remain on the sideboard at the departure of my guests. Whether this practice not to "leave a wreck behind" is as general here as in Malta, I am unable to decide. At the latter place, let the provision be ever so abundant, what the stomach cannot compass the pockets are sure to hold, and in stuffing those no great nicety is observed; so the article is portable at all, it finds its way into one or the other of the pedestrian saddle-bags as by instinct. I have been assured by one of our officers that, at a great fête which General Fox recently gave at Malta, one of the inhabitants (of sufficient rank to be of the party) very dexterously, and, as he fancied, unobserved, slipped a small pullet, wrapt in his pocket-handkerchief, into one of his side receptacles. Unfortunately, an officer near him, seeing the sleight-of-hand transaction, poured a dose of parsley and butter after it, saying very coolly, "Allow me, sir, to help you to a little sauce at the same time."'